Defining Moments

There have been some defining moments in my life, where the choices I made affected my life dramatically.  One of these was after I had been in a car accident, actually the car physically hit my body.  Unfortunately my spine didn't react too kindly to it and I was left with some major damage to my back.  The pain was so intense that I could not work for a year.  I did try to go back to work, generally to my detriment, but was finally ordered by my specialist at the time to stop work and just recuperate.  

My body might have been damaged but there was nothing wrong with my mind and it went into overdrive during this time.  Would I ever walk and function properly again? Would I always live with this incredible pain?  Would I ever work again? What would people think of me, if I wasn't my usual high performing self?  Wow, I remember that time well, did I punish myself.  I was very angry, hurt, fearful and incredibly sad during those days.  Darkness set in badly.  It was a continuous fight with myself not to go into the Black Hole. 

I used to journal my thoughts a lot during that time (I still do today).  I still have those books, but can not bear to open them because I know the pain that is inside them.  I only keep them as a reminder never, ever to go back there.  To realise how very far I have come since them is amazing and yes, you can do it too!

During one of my journal entries, I decided that I needed to do something with my brain.  My body was letting me down, but my mind wasn't.  What could I do? What was something that I had been meaning to do before the accident, but told myself, that I didn't really have the time to do.  My answer was to get my finances into order.  I had a large credit card bill at the time which I wanted to get rid of.  My question then, was how was I going to do that?

The next day whilst watching the Oprah Winfrey show (I watched a lot of Oprah and she is another Idol of mine) a lady by the name of Suze Orman came onto the show.  She had just written a book, Nine Steps to Financial Freedom.  Wow!  This was the answer to my question.  I phoned a book store, purchased a copy and they personally delivered it that day.  (I couldn't drive and didn't leave the house at that time).  I consumed the book and all the advice it offered and started to re-organise all my finances to help pay off the debt. 

The next defining moment was only a couple of weeks later.  Again I was watching TV and the Paralympics were on.  I was amazed and inspired at the performances and after an hour watching, something just clicked.  These athletes all had their stories too.  The difference between them and me, was that they, despite their challenges, were living a life, not only that, they were doing it on the world stage and winning!  They were all winners.  I knew at that moment I needed to change my life.  I couldn't continue being the victim of the accident, despite the injuries and damage to my body.

The next week I had a lady contact me regarding an advertisement I had placed in the paper for share accommodation.  This was one of Suze Orman’s tips to financial freedom (and to pay off my credit card).  The tip was to earn more money and spend less.  Simple, right.  But how was I going to earn more money when I was ordered not to work?  A couple of Suze's suggestions included selling something you no longer needed or renting out a spare room.  I had a spare room, so I advertised for a boarder and a lovely lady by the name of Kerry entered my life.  Nothing unusual about that, people get boarders all the time.  Two weeks after she moved in, I had another light bulb go off in my head.  Kerry was a personal trainer. I asked her if she would help me become strong again.  I remember the very first session we had.  I was able to get down on my knees and roll onto a Swiss ball.  I managed to roll off it and back onto my feet.  Pain ripped through my body and I burst into tears.  That was my first training day. The second was not much better.  But I am pleased to say, two years later she had me doing 40 full male push ups.  What a journey, and something I will be forever grateful for.

We all have defining moments in our life.  The key is what to do with them.  Determine a positive outcome, believe in it.  Don’t worry at this point about how you are going to get there.  You will be amazed how the right people will come into your life to help you along the way.

There is much more to my story, but I will leave that for the book.  Stay tuned.


 I  have been an award-winning and successful business woman all my life – but I have always felt something was missing.  That missing piece of the puzzle that prevents the picture from being perfect.  I had many unanswered questions. I had too many, whys?  Why did this happen, why was it like that?

Now I am blessed for I have found the piece (actually there were several pieces.)  I knew intuitively that I could take my story and use the wonderful tools that I have gained along my journey to ‘help others, help themselves’.   

I am now a professional Life and Business Transformational Coach, and licensed and certified Heal Your Life, Achieve Your Dreams trainer.

Photo: Damien Munro and Kayleen Allen. Certified Heal Your Life Leaders